Ace is High

Word of the Day Challenge. Today’s word is Bus Driver.

I hope I never have another Monday (or any other day) like this one.

It all started with the crazy bus driver. He’d never driven me before, but I’d heard talk among the other busses. He was a real piece of work; I’ll tell you that.

Here’s how it went: The bus driver, let’s call him Ace, yanks my door open, lumbers up the stairs and flops his fat butt in the driver’s seat. And stink! You wouldn’t have believed it. Ace needed more than just a bath; he was a job for Hazmat. Plus, the pungent odors of weed and alcohol oozed from his pores.

This is no bueno.

Before he sticks the key in the ignition, he takes a flask out of his pocket and downs whatever was in it. My guess is bourbon although I am no expert.

I have to think fast. If I pretend not to start, he’ll just hop into another bus. So, he fires me up and off we go. I’ll admit I was scared. This clown was all over the road. I couldn’t let him drive the Special Ed. kids (or any kids, for that matter) around like this. They have enough problems without this moron jeopardizing their lives.

We made it to the first stop light. When the light turned green, he accelerated, and I jammed my gears and locked up. It hurt, sure, but what else could I do‽ I just bit my bumper and sucked it up.

We were too far from the station for him to walk back, so he’d have to radio for help. Before that could happen, a cop pulls up behind us.

I’m like, “Hell, yeah!”

He gets out of his car and walks up to the driver side window, but Ace won’t open it. The cop knocks a few times and Ace ignores it. You can tell the cop is getting pissed. Realizing that he’s dealing with some kind of an idiot, he calls for back-up. Soon, there are sirens, and two more cop cars pull up.

By this time Ace is oblivious. Cops are knocking on the door but Ace either can’t or won’t open it so one of the cops kicks it in. Yeah, that hurt too, but who cares‽ It was worth it in the end.

They dragged Ace out and cuffed him. I assume they carted him off to jail. Eventually, I was towed to a garage.

Luckily, the worst thing that happened today was that the kids were late to school.