• Honeymoon Magic

    Honeymoon Magic

    June 17, 2021

    It’s time for Cyranny’s Quickie again! Today she’s asking, Do you enjoy camping?

     

    I do not enjoy camping in the least. Here’s why:

    When I got married for the first time, which is among the Top 10 biggest mistakes of my life, hubby decides we should camp near an Indian Reservation on the first night of our honeymoon.

    Boy, oh boy was I excited! Camping in New Mexico in November. Yeah, buddy! What new bride wouldn’t be thrilled?

    It was late afternoon by the time we managed to get the tent set up. It was already getting pretty chilly and Ihad to use the restroom. Well, of course there was no restroom so I had to find a nice secluded spot in the woods. The woods weren’t very lush since we were damn near in the desert so I found a large tree to go behind.

    Just as I got “in position” the sky suddenly went dark and this weird flapping noise was everywhere. Bats. Many, many bats. I was terrified. Unhappy, too.

    Apparently every evening at dusk, the bats come out of their caves or whatever. Who knew?

    That’s all I remember about the camping trip.

    The divorce was final October 28th of the following year.

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  • Fascination

    Fascination

    June 5, 2021

    It’s that time again: Quadrille Monday over at the dVerse Poets Pub. De Jackson is our host today, and the prompt is curiosity.

    And then

    I saw you and

    had to know:

    What’s behind that smile,

    those heart-stopping baby-blues,

    that sudden, lopsided grin.

    Is there some-

    One

    in your life?

    What’s her name?

    No matter!

    Indeed.

    My near-fatal curiosity is reserved

    only

    for those most intriguing.

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  • Fibbing Friday | 6/4/2021

    Fibbing Friday | 6/4/2021

    June 4, 2021

    It’s Fibbing Friday once again so let’s get ready to fib! Di of pensivity101 fame is our host today. Questions are below.

    1. A stitch in time saves a trip to Walmart.

    2. Too many cooks result in a food fight.

    3. Many hands make many fingerprints.

    4. A bird in the hand will poop in your palm.

    5. Actions speak louder than a tree falling in the forest. 

    6. All that glitters is bling!

    7. People in glass houses need lots of Windex and paper towels.

    8. Fools rush in like white on rice.

    9. Don’t count your chickens; they don’t count you.

    10. Give them an inch and ask what they can do for their country.

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  • Curb Appeal

    Curb Appeal

    June 3, 2021
    PHOTO PROMPT © Liz Young

    It’s time for Friday Fictioneers again! This week our host, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields has chosen the above image as our visual prompt. 100 words.

    “Oh, Daphne!” Ginger exclaimed. “I love what you’ve done with the place. Really kicks up the curb appeal.”

    “Why, thank you, Ginger!” Daphne gushed. “Our Montague created it. He’s majoring in Extreme Sculpture at Princeton, you know.”

    “Indeed.” Ginger replied. “The delicate arrangement of bricks and concrete on the sidewalk is phenomenal. Signs of a true artiste!”

    “Signs of a true idiot, you mean!” Daphne’s husband interjected.

    “Alfred!” Daphne gasped. “Our son —”

    “Our son is going to put us in the poor house! You know how many cars I’ve had to buy so he can crash them into… art?

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  • Fifth Grade

    Fifth Grade

    June 2, 2021
    Vanderhoof Elementary School InfoUSA

    There are many songs I could write about today. I could tell you how Dean Martin’s “Everybody Loves Somebody” evokes images of my mom ironing in the kitchen, singing along with the record player.  We had to keep a book of matches on its arm to ensure the record wouldn’t skip.

    Yeah, I could do that.

    But she passed away 17 years ago and I don’t want to go there.

    Not today. I’ll go there on Friday which is the anniversary of her death or as we Jews call it, her Yahrtzeit.

    I could also tell you about how my dad & my Uncle Nick would get sloshed at parties and break into a sloppy rendition of “The Good Ship Lollipop.” Imagine two big, goofy, middle-aged Polish guys hanging on each other, belting out a Shirley Temple tune. I guess you had to be there.

    Instead, I’m going to tell you about “The Sounds of Silence,” by Simon & Garfunkel.

    Picture it: Arvada, CO in the early 1970s.  Vanderhoof Elementary School.  Music class with Miss Robbins who later became Mrs. Young.

    My best friend Lisa and I had “found” each other that year. You know how when you are ten years old and you meet that certain friend with whom you instantly and totally click? That was me & Lisa.

    We were immature, at best. Kids in the 3rd grade had more on the ball than we did. Our parents couldn’t stand us (at the same time). Other kids couldn’t stand us. Teachers…they had it the worst.

    Okay, so one day there we are in music class and standing right next to each other, of course. Miss Robbins announces that we are going to sing “The Sounds of Silence.” Lisa and I begin elbowing one another while trying to stifle our giggles. No way were we going to make it through that song without incident. We both knew it, but we had to try.

    It was manageable until we got to the part that goes “…and in the naked light I saw…”.  Lisa and I simultaneously combusted.

    Why you ask?

    Well, it’s like this: the word “naked” was capable of inciting raucous merriment in our puerile minds.

    Forty-eight years later, I still have to smile wheneverthat song comes on the radio.

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