The Live Monkey Wrench

It’s Haibun Monday over at the dVerse Poets Pub. Our prompt is birthdays.


No doubt about it, there are some couples who simply should not procreate. My parents were in this number. They probably should have dated for a while & called it good. But no, they had to take that ball and run with it — smack dab into a wall. From the first month it was a union fraught with peril, according to my mom. She knew she’d made a mistake, but hung in there anyway. Then she got pregnant and almost left my dad when she was three months along.

After I was born, things really got interesting. From what I hear, it was as though a live monkey wrench had been tossed into a clusterf**k. Dad had his heart set on a boy, so I was a disappointment right out of the chute. I did not deviate from this path, as Dad often pointed out. Mom was happy with me though. In the end, some mistakes cannot be undone, such as hapless slips of sperm.

 

Please, no cards or gifts.

forget cake and candles, too;

a day best ignored.

 

 

ShutterStock

 

 

 

11 responses to “The Live Monkey Wrench”

  1. I think your intentions here were humorous (correct me if I am indeed wrong), but I hope you don’t truly feel that way. <3

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, Lucy. Yes, I figured I’d better lighten it up a bit. :-)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. gillena cox Avatar
    gillena cox

    LOL
    Happy Monday

    Much✏love

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Thank you for joining us with your ironic tanka, Susan, which made me smile, being the result of a slip up myself.
    Could you turn it into a haibun with at least one short paragraph of prose for Haibun Monday?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I will try, Kim. It might do me some good to write about it. Thanks for the suggestion!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I was a planned baby, but turned up with the wrong plumbing as both my parents were convinced i was going to be a boy. Not that it mattered. Mum and Dad rarely argued and I had a happy childhood. They would have celebrated their 70th Wedding Anniversary tomorrow.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. How nice! I’m glad your childhood was good.

      Like

  5. Your haibun is honest and tells it like it is, Susan. I agree that there are some couples who simply should not procreate. Whether they are aware of it or not is another question. In the past, once you were married and had children, you had to stay with it regardless of how unhappy you made each other and your children. And I still love the irony in the phrase ‘hapless slips of sperm’ and the way the tanka has become the perfect haiku.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Kim. I really appreciate your kind words. It wasn’t an easy write by any means, but like you said, it is honest.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. i admire the way you lightened this up. We are all gifts, all of us meant to be with reasons to celebrate, no matter how anyone else perceives us or treats us.

    Liked by 2 people

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