Ergo, the Ogre

Morrie made a huge mistake. This is what can happen when you don’t think things through.

It all started when Morrie decided he was tired of working. He was an accountant who was bad with numbers. His Uncle Raymond had gotten him the job as a favor to his father since Raymond owed him one.

From his first day on the job, Morrie knew he was in the wrong place. He hated math. It never made any sense to him. Especially anything more complicated than long division, like fractions. Fractions had poor Morrie in tears! One thing is for sure; math isn’t for everyone.

Morrie was more of an outdoors kind of guy. He liked animals, the fresh air, and solitude. Morrie wanted to be a ranch hand, a cowboy or farmer. Something where people weren’t hovering and checking his work and complaining about how dumb he was.

All he could think of was to pray to the gods with all of his heart and soul. He thought about offering a gift, but what do you get a god who has everything? So, Morrie prayed for months. Eventually, it stuck. One night Hera had come to him in a dream and asked what his heart’s desire was. Morrie quickly answered that he would appreciate it if she could arrange for everything he touched to turn to gold. She asked if he was sure and replied that he was indeed — double dog sure, in fact.

When the alarm clock woke Morrie up that morning, he didn’t remember the dream right away. He slammed his hand down on the alarm clock and boom! It turned to gold.

Oh, yeah! That’s right!

So, after he had fun turning everything in his apartment gold, he decided to go in to work and tell Uncle Raymond that he was quitting. Morrie was learning that he had to be uber careful about what he touched until he could figure out how to control this ‘gift from the gods.’ So, he walked to work for fear of turning his horses and chariot to gold.

When he arrived at his building, the two guards greeted him as they always did. They were the only people who were nice to him there. Purely out of habit he shook hands with them and boom! There were two golden guards where two mortal men once stood.

Yikes! This isn’t what I meant! How can I undo this‽

Morrie began praying to Hera with all his might until a more pressing problem arose.

He had to use the restroom.